Keeping The Relationship Together After The Loss of A Child

After the loss of a child, a husband and wife may want to spend some time apart to mourn their child. Both feel anger, betrayal, and pain at the death of someone who they had and have so much hope and love for. Seeing each other may be a reminder of a dream that is gone.

It is a well-known fact that the death of a child is one of the leading causes of divorce. The turmoil and heartache of losing may shatter the human spirit. Husbands and wives may change drastically while in the mourning process. Life may never be the same again. Keeping the relationship together after the loss of a child might not be on the top of a couple’s list of things to do, but it may be the key to lessening the pain of and transcending loss.

Keeping Together–Seeing Your Partner As A Partner Again

After the loss of a child it is important to give yourself time and room to mourn and remember your child. You may always feel an emptiness and longing in your heart. There may be very little relief from the heartache you feel for your child. At times, the present pain may go away, but the ache grows and lives on inside you. Taking time for yourself to heal and rise above loss is healthy and will be healthy for your family when you decide to “return” from mourning. The question is, will you return and, if so, when? One way to make sure you return to your family is to remember that your husband, wife, boyfriend, girlfriend, or significant other is also feeling the same way. He or she has also lost a child.

By seeing your child’s other parent as a partner instead of just another person, you can keep your relationship together after a tragic loss. You can give each other time and space to mourn your child, and you can give each other support and encouragement when it is needed. Remember that you both loved and love your child. Share the memories and remember the love that you had for your child and for each other.

Keeping together means keeping the love alive. Many parents lose these feelings for each other after a tragic loss because of the mourning process, which may take months and even years. Time spent separately and feelings of loneliness, meaninglessness, and depression can push two people who loved each other apart. To keep together, try to do things you usually did before your child passed away. Try to celebrate the holidays again. Valentine’s Day is a perfect holiday to remind yourselves that you still love each other. Keep your child’s memory alive by reminiscing together, creating a scholarship in your child’s name, making yearly donations in your child’s name, wearing a locket with your child’s picture in it, or many other ways.

Keeping the love alive and the relationship in tact may not be easy. The dream that you once had together may seem broken into shards after your child’s death. The dream may seem distant, but it has not died. Always remember that you can patch up again. And you can rebuild together with each other.